Tag Archives: manicure

return of the tranny-mani

17 Dec

Admire my Santa-claws.

I accidentally scratched the cashier at the supermarket on the way home

I accidentally scratched the cashier at the supermarket on the way home

After tomorrow, I’ve got three weeks off from my Qwik-e-Mart job, so thought I’d get my bitch slappers buffed and primed for the festive season down under.  Anyone who has a job that involves doing stuff or touching things knows that it can leave one’s mitts looking less than glamorous.

before

before

I kind of wish I’d packed before getting my nails done.  Also typing this is really hard.

Speaking of packing, I’m starting to think about panicking about it.  I just feel… so organised.  In that peaceful way you do when you find yourself with an unexpected free day, before realising at 5pm you’ve missed a christening or something.  (Just kidding, friends with kids.  I might have drunk a 12-pack at a baby shower once but I’ve never missed a christening).

deer me

deer me

I have gifts for the immediate family under control, all my laundry is done… apart from the ongoing problem of not knowing what to actually wear in forty degree heat, I’ve done everything I can.  Super organised.

Not really sure what/how much makeup to bring either.  Just the basics?  LOL.  I’ve got the tiger facepaint in already, and made a shortlist of the top five foundations.  I reorganised my makeup the other day actually and geez I’ve got a lot.  A collection spanning many many years.  

Chloe sometimes looks at me rummaging through it all and says “don’t pretend you know what you’re looking for in there” – referring in particular to a massive glass salad bowl I have, filled with identical MAC lipsticks in their beautiful black matte tubes.  But I do know them all, I do.  Their names, their finishes, their colours.  Don’t worry, I’m not about to call a bunch of lipsticks ‘my babies’ or anything vom-worthy like that… but my love is real.

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Anyway I really had better make a start on this packing business. Here is a CD I won’t be listening to while I do it:

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As you can see I really made an effort to get into the spirit of things, but if I still hate carols even when they’re sung by the greats of classic rock and metal, then it’s just not going to happen.

Hope your pre-festivus run up is fun and stress-free etc.  Don’t forget to call someone you haven’t spoken to in a while and give some money to homeless charity too, just so it’s not all about unimportant things like whether the tinsel clashes with the baubles or whatever.

Here’s The Darkness with Christmas Time (Don’t Let The Bells End), because this one’s not so bad.

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smiles all round

14 May
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I’m too sexy for this tooth

I got back from Germany yesterday, and back to Oban about 3 hours ago, to find a package waiting for me.  From the one and only glorious, gorgeous Irene!

In amongst a whole lot of fabulous goodies, there was some tooth blackening enamel, attractively modelled by me above.  Can’t wait to get busy creeping everyone out with this!

In the meantime, I’m freakin’ shattered from all the beer I had to drink last weekend, so … I’ll have to come up with something more intelligent for Thursday’s post.  Look forward to it, dear reader, you know what I’m like Xx

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mullet + biker boots + dirndl = ??

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my nasty little plait is no match for Chloe’s

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but I am getting better at fish-tail plaiting!

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sober

life is a biergarten

10 May

I’m in Germany this weekend with Chloe, Ian and Alewyn, to meet up with a big group of our German friends for a beer festival.

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I got these yellow, red and black nail stripers from http://www.sparkly-nails.co.uk

This will be the third time I’ve been, and it’s always a lot of fun.  I love everything about Germany.  The people:

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fantasy

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reality

the party atmosphere…

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fantasy

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reality

… the food…

fantasy

fantasy

 

reality

reality

 

… the everything.  I’m looking forward to this lil holiday so much!  Time to whack on my dirndl, blow off some steam and go mental with the most efficient of party animals.

Don’t miss me too much xX

 

is it possible….

6 May

… to take a photo of your hand that DOESN’T look completely freaky?

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apparently not

These nails are inspired by Steven Tyler’s trousers in the Girls of Summer video. You haven’t seen it? That’s a shame. Here it is, watch it just quickly now.

nailed it: Zombody to love

22 Apr

Wordplay stolen from Carissa.

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Iron Fist ‘zombie stomper’ nail transfers

These Iron Fist bad-boys came in a neat lil packet with a nail file and wooden stick to poke your cuticles with.

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I’ve used lots of different brands of nail transfers, and I have to say (having only worn these so far for a few hours) that I’m pretty impressed.

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The instructions recommend buffing your nails and applying the transfers to a clean surface, but I also suggest putting on a base coat, whatever you would normally put on your nails if you are so inclined.  For a while I have been using Sally Hansen Miracle Cure Problem Nail Strengthener.

I recommend this for two reasons; partly to give the sticker something to grip, but mostly to protect your natural nail.  So when you peel it off, it doesn’t take bits of your own nail with it.  Stickers are dark horses; wearing them back-to-back for several weeks last summer, I found myself with soft flaky nails, good for nothing.

I suggest putting on a base coat, letting it dry, then applying your transfers.

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All nail stickers are usually designed for long-ish nails; you need to have some length to be able to wrap the transfer over, to file it off.  And the designs are usually for longer nails – some of the zombie eyeballs were kind of cut off, even on my nails which I would say are pretty long right now.

Speaking of.  You might have also noticed that some of my nails are revoltingly long and pointy; this is a nail-shape that seems to work well for me, as in, it resists chips and splits etc, and I can grow my nails disgustingly long if I file them in to a point while I do it.  Also makes me feel like Cat Woman.

Anyway.  These nail stickers went on really well; they are a lot softer and more pliable than many other brands I have used, so they were very easy to stretch-to-fit onto my nails, and being so pliable, fit really easily.  I screwed up on two of my nails and to be honest those two are already (a few hours after applying them) showing signs of poor resilience.

Compared to other brands (including Nail Rock) that have been somewhat more brittle, it looks like these will wear well.  I’ll update this post to let you know for sure.  Other brands I’ve used have been more difficult to apply completely smoothly, and that seems to be the trouble with any nail sticker; as soon as it’s not perfectly applied, any wrinkles will quickly turn into peeling and lifting.  Makes sense I guess.

Anyway – this post is scheduled to go live on Monday, when I will be heading back home to Oban from Glasgow.  I was there to see Jettblack, so it’s possible that by the time you are reading this, I will have run off with Jon Dow and you won’t hear from me again.  If that is the case I’ll give Chloe my flog password so she can let you all down gently.

Do you think he likes zombie nails?  I hope he likes zombie nails.  Screeeeam!

Update: this is what they look like after 48 hours wear.

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The index and pinky finger are the worst; these are the two that I screwed up putting on.  The pinky is ripped in the middle and the index finger just has quite a big chunk missing from the tip.  As the pattern is so busy it’s not actually that noticeable in real life.

The rest of the nails have worn a little on the tips but not too much.  None of them have peeled or lifted, so, they remain the best-wearing nail stickers I have used – hands down!

nailed it: Illamasqua i’mperfection bird egg nails

14 Apr

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Here’s Loz modelling the Speckle nail polish (colour: Scarce) from Illamasqua’s newest collection, I’MPERFECTION.

Nice, innit?

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As you can see, Loz is a married woman so to all you hand-fetishists that creep around on here, don’t even think about it.  But wouldn’t you say this makes a classic, yet subtley-different nail look for a bride?

By the way, this is polish applied by me drunk in the pub, with no top or base coat, and it’s been on for 2 days already.  Illamasqua nail polish wears really well and stays shiny, get amongst it!  Review coming soon of the excellent matte top coat I bought at the same time… 😀

nailed it: carbon grey with studs

31 Mar

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This is Maybelline Forever Strong Super Stay 7 Days gel nail colour in Carbon Grey #815.  So far it’s been on for 3-4 days and showing no signs of wear – impressed.  It’s a really nice dark gunmetal grey with just the right amount of shimmer to it, and the finish has stayed really shiny.  I applied two coats to get the opacity I like.

Along the tips of my nails I put some little diamond stickers just for fun.  The purple nail is a Sephora colour.

High five!

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